What to do for a friend who has a miscarriage?

Experiencing a miscarriage is a heart-wrenching journey, and being there for a friend during this time requires both empathy and practical support. Beyond offering emotional solace, engaging in tangible acts of kindness can make a profound impact on their well-being. Here are thoughtful ways to assist a friend who has had a miscarriage, encompassing both daily tasks, care for their pets, and managing medical appointments.

Emphasizing the Need for Gentle Support: It's crucial to offer help and be present based on the needs and comfort of the grieving mother. Provide assistance tailored to what your friend wants, needs, and is willing to accept. Be mindful not to overbear or intrude in your desire to help and move at a pace that works for the bereaved mom.

Drop Off a Hot Meal for the Family: Prepare or order a comforting meal and drop it off at your friend's doorstep after a miscarriage. Nourishing the body becomes essential during such trying times, and a ready-made meal can provide comfort and sustenance.

Offer to Pick Up Essentials: Assist with daily tasks by offering to pick up dry cleaning, medicines or groceries. Running errands can be overwhelming, and your help in these areas can be immensely valuable.

Pick Up and Drop Off Living Children: If your friend has other children, offer to pick them up from school, the bus stop or after school activities. Managing daily routines may be challenging, and your assistance can ease the load.

Help with Household Chores: Offer to do household chores such as laundry, cooking, or cleaning. Taking care of these tasks allows your friend to focus on their emotional well-being without the added stress of maintaining the home.

Babysit Living Children: If they have living children, offer to babysit for a few hours. This gives your friend some time for self-care or to attend appointments without worrying about childcare.

Assist with Outdoor Chores: Mow the lawn or shovel snow from their driveway. Outdoor chores can be physically demanding, and your help in this area can be a thoughtful way to show support.

Take Their Pet for a Walk or Vet Appointment: Pets can be a great source of comfort, but caring for them might become challenging after a miscarriage. Offer to take their pet for a walk or accompany them to a vet appointment. This ensures that their furry companion receives the care and attention they need.

Help in Scheduling and Managing Medical Appointments: Offer assistance in scheduling and managing medical appointments after pregnancy loss. This can be a complex and emotionally draining task, and your support can help alleviate the burden.

Make Calls to Cancel Appointments: Offer to make calls on their behalf to cancel any appointments that may be emotionally challenging. This can include medical appointments or other engagements related to the pregnancy.

Cancel Baby Registry: If your friend had a baby registry, assist in canceling it. This can be a difficult task, and your support can ease the emotional burden.

Share News with Friends or Family: Help communicate the news of the miscarriage to friends and family if your friend wishes. This can be a delicate task, and your assistance can provide them with the space they need.

Give a Thoughtful Miscarriage Gift: Consider getting a thoughtful miscarriage memorial gift, such as a miscarriage memorial coinbaby angel figurinehuggable plush heart, or a print of the baby with Jesus safe in heaven. These tangible reminders can offer comfort and provide a way to honor the memory of the baby angel.

In times of grief, practical acts of kindness can be as impactful as emotional support. By extending your help with daily responsibilities, pet care, and medical appointments, you're creating a supportive network for your friend. Approach the situation with empathy, be adaptable to their needs, and remember that small gestures can make a significant difference during such a challenging period.

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I wish people did not try to avoid talking about my baby. I wish my baby’s existence and the following absence were recognized.


So many great suggestions about how to show up and show support after miscarriage. It is important to check on the family not just after pregnancy loss but also in the weeks and months to follow the miscarriage.


Small gestures go a long way a hot meal or a small memorial gift can go a long way in making a friend feel valued. So important to be kind.


I like the emphasis on offering practical support tailored to the needs of the grieving mom. It’s so important to respect her boundaries and move at her pace while providing assistance. This approach honors the mom’s journey and ensures that the support offered is genuinely helpful.


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