8 Ways to Support a Friend After Infant Loss

1. Be Present: Show up for your friend in their time of need. Offer to spend time with them, whether it is texting, calling, just sitting together in silence or going for a walk in the park. Example: "Hey, I'm here for you. Do you want to talk or just hang out?"

2. Validate Their Grief: Acknowledge the incredible depth of your friend's pain and sorrow. Let them know that it is okay to feel however they are feeling and that you are there to support them no matter what. Example: "I can't imagine what you're going through, but I'm here for you and I support you."

3. Offer Practical Support: Help lighten the load by offering to take care of routine errands or chores for your friend. Bring over a home-cooked hot meal or offer to run to the grocery store for them. Example: "I made some pasta and soup for you and your family. I can drop it off later if you'd like."

4. Respect Their Privacy: Give your friend space to grieve in their own way and on their own terms. Do not push them to talk about their feelings if they are not ready, and let them know that you're there for them whenever they need you. Example: "I'm here for you whenever you're ready to talk, but I understand if you need some time alone right now."

5. Remember Significant Dates: Be mindful of important dates such as the baby's birthday, anniversary or Mother's or Father's Day. Reach out to your friend on these occasions to let them know that you're thinking of them and their baby. Example: "I know today is a tough day for you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm here for you and thinking of you."

6. Offer Emotional Support: Be a supportive listener and allow your friend to express their emotions freely. Offer words of comfort and encouragement, and let them know that you're there to support them through the ups and downs of their grief. Example: "I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm here to listen whenever you need to talk."

7. Consider Memorial Gifts: Give a thoughtful gift that honors the memory of your friend's baby. This could be a personalized keepsake, a piece of jewelry with their baby's name or birthstone, or a donation to a charity in their baby's name. Example: "I got you this necklace with your baby's name engraved on it. I hope it brings you some comfort."

8. Avoid Hurtful Remarks: Be mindful of what you say and avoid saying anything that could be hurtful or insensitive. Avoid clichés or platitudes, and instead, offer genuine words of support and empathy. Example: "Everything happens for a reason" or "At least you can try again."

By offering your presence, validating their grief, providing practical and emotional support, remembering significant dates, giving meaningful gifts, and avoiding hurtful remarks, you can help your friend navigate the difficult journey of infant loss with compassion and understanding. Let them know that they're not alone and that you're there to support them every step of the way.